© Broken Ornaments? Almost

- Emme says Happy New Year and Go Colts

© Wasted away my 27th …Almost.

Almost is Enough 2006

A Year in Review...

I’ve dropped friends; gained new friends, got dropped by friends and picked up the friends I lost. Going to the Lake with friends; which I know I’d never get to do with them next year. The snow, and the thought of Nevada having a White Christmas.

I still write interracial stories because I still believe that love in color is blind.

Holy wonka my family still loves me.

My sister’s wedding day and how beautiful there first kiss as a married couple is was and will be. For not having enought money and for the money I had.

For the bowling, the bingos, the roulette wheel thanks for (sometimes) being in my favor. For concerts and shows I enjoyed in 06; let's do it again next year.

We bought a townhouse.

Being bummed out and bouncing back without the use of Prozac, well sort off, okay, I admit the usage of Prozac after all what drug are you taking?

Jeremy I don't know why I'm such a b!tch too you but you know I love you.

Christmas I'm here.

Charlemagne I'm still here dammit.

Neshelle I have your cheescake right here; let me find the ambition to making it first.
Keke because of your poems are genuis and your love for the simple things; (you sure youre not a hippie)

Sarah because of the “White Monty Nag” ordeal perky tits/big tits discussion and the mascara loving MCR guitar smashing diva that will sign just about anything.

Daniel because you cried and I stopped to ask what was your drama.

Chris because of your graphic comic strips panels and that damn sexy voice.

Sergio for the picture exchange and because West is just as beautiful as the West.

Jessie because you was polite when you introduce yourself to me via text message and for letting me sing 'Jessie's Girl'.

Marcus for the :p and Starbucks coffee; I so owe you a cup or a few next year.
Nannette I looked for you on myspace and here we are just rekindling the friendship we never lost; I love you mamma.

Therese your concerts will be beautiful.

Oye Peace I need it, help me find it, for the love of gosh. Remember Teenage Wasteland.

Pnp I wanna see your hair.

Gayle because you dialed my number and never prejudged me.

Alisha I've been busy and you've 2 jobs and when I do call your ass is tired, next year I promise we'll be talking more.

Sara *looks around to make sure no one is listening* that's vente passion tea please.

I don't do advice well since I don't follow them, so sorry.

To Writers Block: "Spoken words are just as amazing as pen to paper and fingers to a keyboard"
To Heroes: "I want to finance the heroes and that makes me a hero too since it is a lot of work saving the world one day at a time and money is always right in the middle of it." he he he. "HRG ('s) is (are) mighty sexy"...

Comicchat:"Damn those feces throwing monkies Echo 1 have saved the day and all the ballons I bought was not needed."

To Tadie and book clubbers: "Sweet; thanks for giving a restless girl the opportunity for having an opinionate every Wednesday night."
Damn it I burned my fingers/arms/elbow again...

"Come over here and pull on my finger"...*spay air freshner*

I want a moon man too.

Movies that made me cry, laugh and wish it was me kissing the main character; i.e Hugh Jackman, Will Smith, Jude Law...

Movies that wanted me to make some choices; i.e. Saw III...

The news really didn't appeal to me this year but hey I'm still a democrat, and the democrats are in Congress so sit your b!tcha$s down Republicans...

Yeah I voted.

TomKat baby sure look cute and America looks weird with braces. Brad and Angelina baby is so damn cute, and oh look another Harry Potter book is coming out. What you say; Tom Sizemore is going to have his own show on VH1. Johnny Depp is truly hot and I'm so loving Jack Sparrow and Orlando Bloom is extremly pretty. Keira as Domino was half believable but as Lizzie on Pride/Prejudice was beautiful..

To the Vegas VJs for taking my calls and taking my suggestions to play songs that people never heard of but playing it on the phone for me and not on air because they can't and this is not the 7os but we still love you Emme..

Revisited songs that reminded me of first love, school, winter/summer, friends i.e. “Silver Springs”,” Leaving on a Jet Plane”, “Age of Aquarius” “Tell Me When”. Oh Gosh, “A Woman Work” IS STILL A BEAUTIFUL SONG and I dedicate it to all mothers, your mom, grandmothers mother in laws and women in general because we too wish we had those moments back.

For any cd collections that have Fleetwood Mac, General Public, ABBA, Mamas and the Pappas, Fifth Dimension, 80’s, and Madonna and for taking the time by pulling the box out and opening the damn thing and reminisce; it’s a great feeling isn’t it? For Coldplay: “Talk”, “Fix you” and “Speed of Sound”; I am moving.

For “Waiting on the World to Change”… I am still waiting.

Thanks a lot “Welcome to the Black Parade” for reminding me and finally admitting to myself how afraid I am of dying and death and it will eventually have to happen.

Song like “Lips of an Angel” reminding us that with just a little bit of faith we too can write a song about affairs and one day making it a hit.

Songs like “Boston” and “Dirt off your Shoulders” which doesn’t mean I’m going to Boston to become a pimp, hahaha.

Lyrics like “I don't need to fight to prove I'm right I don't need to be forgiven. Put out the fire don't look past my shoulder”

I will never forget the hoopla around 06/06/06...

AFI: 6/6/6 'DecemberUnderground' cd.

Reminding myself that the new AFI will never be the old AFI singing heavy one - three minute raw punk songs and Answer That and Stay Fashionable will always be Number 1 with Sing the Sorrow coming in 2nd.

The Killers and Sam’s Town Cd because to me all the songs are continuing stories of everyday people trying to get on and move on.

Wondering what it would be like if I saved my money and purchased my very own guitar, practiced “jukebox Hero” and playing it on 'The Strip'.

Blasting “Ridin” during traffic driving, random driving and demon speeding on freeway while taking pictures of beautiful sunrise and sunsets.

Madonna "Hung Up" video and looking so damn sexy in leotards, purple and half splits, and the moving your body line up towards the end with your dancers, that is so damn hot...

Paul Oakenfold and the Lively Mind cd and the feeling I get every time I stop at the light and the urge to get out of my car and seizure dance or dance if I was high.

The starving artists, future artists and Jared Leto; well 30SM looking so damn emoish hot. More respect for Vegans, sXe, and Red Robin (yes, Red Robin).

Seeing a grown man cry.

The word love and the meaning of it.

For the truth and admitting that I was wrong and the you were right bullfart but just for a second since you’re not perfect but you try to be and the I forgive you’s for trying to be perfect. Oh man all those high risers while I looked on in amazement and wonder.

For the ones getting me through the door thank you.

To the ones that say I play stupid well; I'm sorry if I did it/ done it/ do it/ have done it.

New jobs, celebrating my twenty seventh birthday, Myspace and the add me’s.

I'm sorry for thinking of myself and not of you and other.

For the I-didn't-see-that-coming and the ripping- of-my-heart- and feeding it to the vultures moments; those were fun but I don't think I want to experience again.

The SK3 themes, ringtones and callertune and tmo bullfarts and customer service.

The addiction of text messaging, pictures, and the technology of amazing handhelds.

The cop on Arville who pulled up alongside of me and pointed to his speedometer letting me know that 55 on a 35 mile street are an effin No No and to slow the ef up.

For the paranoid feeling I get and avoiding people when I get that feeling; see I wasn't bloody wrong.

For words like bloody, micky, sod off, wanker, tarts and vicars, vicious, cash money, so hot, and massive; I'm not going to use it next year except for "sod of this you bloody wanker" and "so hot" those I love and will keep.

"Oh shit, whose that texting me?, No worry I'm will answer it, its okay I'm at the stop light."

For the truths...

To sexy men and woman and the cash money they roll (I wish that was me)

To fast cars and freedom (Yes, I know it’s a song).

For Daniel Craig looking so damn hot. This martini is for you.

Remember: “Do something to be someone or be someone and do something” - Emme

See you in o7

© The Taste for... Almost

Through imagination a subtle touch of my fingertips is the heat we feel during a hot summer breeze.
My sweat I taste is compared to the salt of the sea yet nothing compared to your essences boldness and flavors.

The warmth of my tongue as it wash over you brings tears to my eyes.
The sound you make as I open you...
The gentle caress of your smoothness...
The penetration as both you and I meet.

My mouth on top of you are but a pleasure.
I am leaving you this message since I desperately need to taste the salty sticky sweetness of, oh god, sigh...

A chocolate bar.

© This flame is on… Almost

MONDAY:
Stupid good deeds especially over the holiday. You just feel you have to do the right thing and that’s what I did. I mean we are all sitting in traffic not going anywhere I give this guy the go ahead to get in and I get a honk from the guy behind me I screamed out Merry Christmas he didn’t like that, the guy gave me the finger. Needless to say I told him to go in peace. I’m lucky I’m still alike; they’re some crazy f4ckers out here.

I don’t’ want to talk about TUESDAY…

WEDNESDAY:
I had a weird yet meaningful dream: I was walking the dogs in a park and I felt hot but it was snowing but I still took my jacket off, Madonna was across the street stretching and the band Augustana was pointing towards the sky as they serenade a group of people around them, but no one wasn’t looking towards the sky but as I did I noticed a bird falling and landed dead at my feet and I picked it up and it began to flap it wings I let it go but before the bird flew away it bit me pinky finger i began to bleed Damn bird; just saved its life and it bit me…

That evening I was contacted by a friend I haven’t heard from in months and I felt really bad that this whole time I wanted to call her; her name and number is in my contact to do a bit of catching up but I would get catch up into something else. Then out of the blue she calls me reminding me about there annual Christmas Party and If I was going to come. I didn’t know what to say because I haven’t spoken to her since, hell I haven’t talk with her in a long a$s time…



THURSDAY:
I wanted people to call me but I didn’t want to talk. I just wanted to text text text, I received 10,000 text messages last month and I sent 4,000 now this text are from people, groups Aim Yahoo and Msn Mess. I AM NOT PROUD to display this number.
I honestly think, no, I am a text message and SK3 addict addict. I even text message my parents and it will only be a matter of time before a pill will be on the market call handheld pill.


FRIDAY:
This flame is on… almost and I’m in the mood for a good feel good cry, I’m going to go see “The Pursuit of Happiness” tomorrow night and with the positive message of that movie and “will the flood behind me burn out the fire inside me” (AFI –The Missing Frame) I’m going to channel whatever emotion I have and whatever it is that I’m looking for into one.

Then again for the Whole Week:
You ever heard a song and you just wanted to do exactly what that song is telling you to do.
The two songs that is on repeat in my car and in the office:

“Boston”
Think i need a sunrise; I’m tired of the sunset,i hear it's nice in the summer, some snow would be nice...Boston...where no one knows my name...

And

“Dirt off Your Shoulder”
If you feelin like a pimp *beep* go and brush your shoulders offLadies is pimps too, go and brush your shoulders off.

That doesn’t mean I’m going to Boston to become a pimp, hahaha. No, I think there is something about me I have to change; I feel I am doing the same thing over and over again.

“Do something to be someone or be someone and do something” - Emme

© Almost Kiss

I'm sitting behind my desk staring at the bulletin board with pictures of my family my favorite NASCAR drivers; 8 & 99, a sexy pic of Jensen Ackles from his Soap days, the calendar with the date number 17, 18 and 25 circled in red. Old tic stub from concerts I went too in the past and a pic of you and me staring into the camera of my SK3.

With Aerosmith Dream On in the background I let my mind drift into a daydream about you and me.

You walked by me and with a smile you stop because I know you will be back to see me.I said something funny and you smile, then it began to rain so you took a hold of my hand and we both ran for cover under a tree that appeared out of nowhere, it was a big tree with leaves the size of a fan blade protecting us. My hair is wet and I don't care. I am shivering and a blanket appeared and you wrapped us both in it.
We are that close now and you leaned in to kiss me and I'm ready for it... Here it comes...

Then I say this and I don't know why but I do:
Would you marry me? We can go up in the mountain to live. We can be wild and care free. We can take baths in the same river forest animals take baths, take a dump in and play in. We can both let our hair grown down to our feet, I don't have to shave nothing and if you want I can braid your beard/hair. We can make up our own language, like unga for sex, stitck for cooking, allabamwa for stink. We can scratch each other scalps like the monkies do, we can embrace the mosquitoes as they bite us fiercely as we freely run naked in the woods, we can build a house with the leaves from this tree and we can both pretend we can build a fire and dance naked around it.Really would you marry me?

You gave me a funny look and he moved back, needless to say I did not get that kiss and the daydream was so over, oh well.

© Almost Lost It…

I’m sharing an amazing bowl of rocky road ice-cream with Jared Leto as we sat in front of a bonfire in the snow as he was about to lean in to kiss me on, my effin alarm goes off – GodDarnIt!!!
Something is going to happen today.
I took a shower I even took an amazing snap shot of my soapy tits to share with a friend I consider a kindred spirit on speed (haha) although neither one of us are on speed and this friend never got the picture. What a bummer…
I’m online banking, is that 35% of my check in account? Where the hell is the rest of it?
I did a quick time difference math in head, okay if its 4am here then its ET something there, which was stupid when I have Time Traveler on my Sidekick 3.
Think Emme, but don’t panic, after all you just mailed some checks on Wednesday which will bounce today so….Don‘t panic.

I’ll just click refresh one more time, okay same amount, one more time...

Same effin amount; its cool;
Be cool Emme be cool

I logged out and begin to pace almost tripped over the damn dog too since she was also pacing with me wagging her tail and barking like this was some kind of damn game.

I will get ready and wait…I will wait another minute…

Screw that minute and go for a second. I logged in again and stared at that 35% which was beginning to look like a vicious b!tch taunting me.
I was cold driving to work because the window was down and I wanted everyone around me to hear that I was listening to 30 Second to Mars, by then I’m screaming to Was It a Dream at stoplight and I’m off key but I’m trying to be positive from a negative moment.

"Hey you want to race?"

At this very moment work sucks…

Cut me a check for Monday bloody morning, are they like kidding me or something. I can just count the days my bank account is being overdrawn.

“That is not our problem Ms C; you need to speak with your employer”
“It was posted Emme double check with your bank again”

Long story short; after two cups of hot chocolate, a flirt or two with sexy a$s jobsite laborer, three calls to bank, six calls to Corporate and several daydreams later …Check will be in my hand today…

Think I will play a little Jay-z now.

If you feelin like a pimp *beep*, go and brush your shoulders off Ladies is pimps too, go and brush your shoulders off*Beep* is crazy baby, don't forget that boy told you Get, that, dirt off your shoulder

© Almost Standing On a Soapbox…The Spin Cycle

Is this thing on? *taps microphone* well is it because I have something to say…
I clear my throat and blow in the microphone.
Look, wanting to be someone different is a lot of work. Wanting to be different is easy.
How was I suppose to know that wanting to be different is a lot of work; it takes a lot of strain out of someone.
You lose sight of things and people begin to lose sight of you.
Where are we going and what proof do we have to make?
Come on, really. Should your life or mine be so complicating?
Is this microphone still on?
Are you like me staring at yourself in the mirror trying to rip away what you almost created?
My only excuse to the way I am right now is at this very moment, I want to be someone different; without the fears, the doubt and the wonder if you are still talking behind my back…Then I think I'm me... I am sassy, I am aggressive, I am bold, I could dish it out the same way. In my dreams I’m pistol whipping President Bush yet I am against guns. I love smiles I think men that wear eyeliner is hot, I drink socially, I am a woman and yeah I could be b!tchy and I’m not sorry for that, I belch I use the damsel in distress card when I need to use it. I like you a lot but...just like me you re trying to be different…
I'm getting really tired of this stupid soapbox I'm standing on... I'm getting off now.
Wait! Not to worry it should get a lot easier now you'll see, think of it like 'the spin cycle'

© An Almost Is Enough? Not Really: A Coyote Gulch Chain Story

Welcome to Coyote Gulch, NV. A town located outside of Las Vegas Nevada. Just south of nowhere; a town all by itself right in the middle of the desert. If you close your eyes and listen really hard, you can hear the sound of just about anything your heart desired. With a population of 12,460 and with at least 60 starbuck locations, you would think that this town is pretty normal, but with all towns you have the same issues and drama like the rest of the world, where the rules have no limits and the passing of hands are dirtier than a crooked cop accepting favors. Then again there is that crooked cop and that shady mayor getting those blow jobs from his assistant while his wife looks away as she pulls out the pot roast from the oven. Who can you really turn too and who can you trust since everyone knows everyone else’s business and bad news are the best news of the day. Some people leave but they always come back type of town.
There is the good in the town, family walking to the park hand in hand while the kids are ahead skipping and singing while they suck on their Popsicle sticks, there is that open door policy: “My home is your home”, the cub scouts summer picnics, the recreational pool, and those beauty pageants. Ah yes, it was that kind of love/hate relationship type town.

Tyson; Musician who lives off other people a risk taker, slacker ultimate bad boy but the smoothness of ultimate sexiness he prefers to take the easy way out of any sticky situation. Doesn’t have the time for love but he likes the feeling especially with this girl he always looks for when he goes back home…

Morgan; Currently Unemployed a dreamer who believes in reincarnation, thinks she was a gypsy in her past life which makes he seems like a bit of an outcast in this small town that she loves but constantly on the move she is waiting for something to happen but she has a real issue with showing real emotions when she gets the chance she steps in any relationship head on; telling her self why bother getting her feet wet first...

Jasmine: Police Officer who knows that they’re crooked cops on the force but she has her own issues to take care of in her life right now and besides life is too short to just sit back and watch, caution is for the weak minded, after all she is sleeping with her married partner and this is a small town…

Brian: Regional Branch Manager can lure people to him with just a smile how else he became the branch manager a family man who follows a code of ethic but will go out and do something sinful on a whim knows it’s smarter to build alliances, sometimes even with the enemy in this town…

It was a typical bright blue cloudless sky on a typical hot sweaty Sunday morning in Coyote Gulch, NV as they woke up and listened to the one lone dog that barked far away, and so it began…

If you are interested and would like to add to this story using any of these characters please let me know.
Send your replies to:
write4_us@yahoo.com.
All stories will be posted on http://coyotegulchnv.blogspot.com/

-Emme

© Almost Friendship Lost

At times when we get lost; we look to our friends to put us on the correct path.
True friendship involves a relationship -- no, not that kind of relationship -- but rather like a baby taking its first steps. And with time, the baby steps transform from walking to pacing to jogging.
Friendship is time well spent. Like a great bottle of wine ... it improves with age.
As we get to know one another, with shared memories, we are empowered by the growth we see in each other.Trust.
We have to able to share our lives, thoughts, feelings, and frustrations without censure.
Without trust, in a blink of an eye, intimate secrets can be destroyed at the snap of a finger.
A casual betrayal...we are abandoned, lonely.
But it too is but a passing moment..... if....a big if....we are supported.
How are we to reverse the downward spiral without the encouragement of those around us? A shoulder to cry on.
Yes, we need those hugs.
Genuine friendship supports during times of struggle.
I love my friends no matter what, and I will always want the best for them.
I miss them so much!

© Almost Had Wings

For my sisters:

Look at that caged bird, chirping away like an idiot. Doesn’t she know that she is in a cage with clipped wings?
Not much room to spread her wings and fly.
Can’t fly for shit, can’t fly to freedom, and can’t fly to find her one.
Just sitting there; cheeping and eating.
What a waste of time.
This is complete bullshit, for a little while she thought she found what she was hoping for, just a bit of light, and some hope of love.
With everything life have to offer she give the thought a try but just like that stupid caged bird she couldn’t fly for shit, she couldn’t fly to freedom, and she couldn’t fly to the one who will eventually get away.
How much room does she need in order to spread her wings?
He’s perfect.
She want to be in his life and evidently a produce of emotional strain and baggage are included but she didn’t care she want to share some of his strain and forget her own.
Then she thought: 'what am I thinking, typical me always trying to be someone else’s savior and not my own.'
She must remove those shades of hers so shecan see clearly into this life she so desperately can’t have…
In just a matter of moments he didn’t give her much to work with other than her wanting to say something spiteful; because he was speaking the truth, if it was meant to be then it will be, but she can’t wait. Hell she doesn’t want to wait any bloody more.
But she thought as she stared at the caged bird in her cage: 'What is the big deal about love anyway other than it leaves me searching for some freedom to fly? Like that caged bird, my time will eventually come if I just dream a little bit harder.'

© Almost Called You

Temptation Realized but Maintained:

She have bitten her fingernails to the skin, randomly typing words on her keyboard, a bit of drumed fingers on the desk, a few pacing, tapping of her bare feet on the tile floor and humming a made up song all for the reason of NOT doing something she want to do so desperately.
Trying to keep her mind from wondering what you and your kids are up too and what you have planned for the day.
Trying to preoccupy her time by doing things she don't want to do; like work on a really shitty Wednesday morning as she listen to 'synth' music all in the hope that she will not pick up her cellphone, and dial your telephone number by heart.
She have to call; she want to hear your voice - she need to hear your voice.
See it's the want/need game again playing tricks on her.
Oh my bloody god, thirteen more hours to go.

© Almost Hello

As I stand alone in the cold, I realize that if I remain motionless for just a second I can hear a hello from the distance.What kind of hello is this that I hear as I remain motionless?It's warm and fuzzy and full of cuddle.What a crock of shit.Oh look… It's raining now and it couldn't have come at a more perfect time. The cold air and the rain. it's just a matter of time before the warm hello has turned to ice...My tears have turned to ice. Yes, I'm crying...But it's not like you care anymore since your hellos are no longer warm and full of cuddle. I'm crying because it is my release; cathartic tears to wash away the ugliness and reveal the self worth beneath.I remain motionless in this cold wet thought of mind and wonder.Released through tears, my confidence swells with all this spirit, character, and soul mixed with a little bit of doubt...What chance do I have if I respond to your hello?Why bother, since it is so much better not to say anything at all.

© Almost Obsessed

The make me feel good man. I don’t know what kind of relationship we had but it was great in the beginning but now I think he was trying to hard and I didn’t like it and I sure as hell didn’t want that.

I wanted to be around him
He wanted to be around 24/7…
I just wanted to breathe.
He wanted to inhale.

Then I wanted him 24/7 and he finally exhaled and I still wanted him.
Boredom began to sink in and I know it was there but I refused to see it. I thought with just a bit of that something extra special I can bring him back but he was already gone.
I began to get paranoid, depressed and questioned my self worth.
I don’t need that so I let him go.

© Almost Empty

A friend left to see a show just the other day and I wanted to go not to see the show, but just to be with him. We're not that close, I'm not even on his top eight, nor do we share the same taste in music.
Not even close in age, but for some reason the guy really intrigue me - like we are both a secret to each other. No one knows about him andi'm sure he's friends doesn't even know anything about me. Should have mentionthat. Out of touch and it really is beginning to make me feel a bit empty... I mean come on he has a handheld and he just loves to text.
Then I get a text message from him saying something stupid and with a sigh of relief I smile, I'm not as empty as I though.